why it’s important to be intentional when we cope
there are healthy & unhealthy ways to cope. there are also coping mechanisms that can be healthy or unhealthy depending on the situation. here’s an example to show why it’s important to be intentional about how we cope:
one of the ways we can cope is distraction. distraction allows us to focus our attention away from whatever is stressing us out.
distraction includes:
engaging in hobbies (reading, painting, playing music, gardening)
watching something (shows, movies, youtube, tik tok)
socializing
working out or moving our bodies
listening to music
playing games (puzzles, video games, bird games, crosswords)
so how can distraction be either healthy or unhealthy? any of these activities, when done without intention or when done in excess, could possibly turn into avoidance or denial.
let’s say you had a mentally exhausting day at work. you get home & don’t feel like doing anything—you don’t want to think about work & you don’t want to deal with anything else. you open your phone to start scrolling through tik tok.
if you don’t pause to check in with yourself, it’s not the end of the world. but doing so could help you to validate your experience & acknowledge your emotions. it could also prevent you from staying disconnected from yourself longer than you like—what if you ended up scrolling on tik tok for a few hours? that avoidance could potentially leave you feeling worse as you come back to reality, feeling out-of-control since your night is almost over & you haven’t addressed your emotions.
here’s a possible alternative. maybe as you’re opening tik tok, you pause & ask yourself a few questions:
what am i feeling right now? overwhelm, fatigue, frustration.
what am i wanting right now? to disengage & not think about anything.
what am i needing right now? to distract myself & emotionally regulate—which can be done through the comfort & ease of scrolling through videos.
it’s perfectly healthy to decide to distract ourselves. what is also healthy is being intentional in that distraction. if we pause to acknowledge what activity we are engaging in to distract ourselves—and why we are engaging in it—we are claiming power, choosing autonomy & gaining awareness.
*you can read more of these posts on my instagram page, @therapy.with.emilee
